May 30, 2014

Grace for the Imperfect Mama – by Author and Blogger, Jenni Mullinix

Posted in Christianity, Family tagged , , , at 11:12 am by Lisa Ritchey

I am the mother of a 26-year-old man.  He is an amazing person: Kind, generous, fun, funny, compassionate, polite, L O V E S  to fish – for fish and souls, he loves the L–d and serves Him well, defends the defenseless, & takes up for “the little guy”.  (He is 6 ft. 5 in. and 320 lbs.  I call him an oak tree on two trunks.  Oh, if only he had stayed with football!  He was  a sight on the soccer field, though!) He is just about everything a mother could hope that their child could be – he is a true Southern Gentleman, just a Good Ol’ Boy (aka ORIGINAL Redneck).  I have his teachers continually tell me what a great kid he was, even those that did not have him in class but just knew him from around school.  They all literally gush over him.  This always just makes my heart sing!  I am so proud of the man he has turned out to be.

This did not happen by accident.  I was not his friend.    We live in the South and I am his M O T H E R!  That means that I told him no, told him yes, told him maybe, told him “we’ll see”, kissed his boo boos, helped with homework, cheered at his ball games, volunteered in his public school classes and was a substitute teacher in his elementary and Junior high school. (Yes, I actually have 1,200 kids.  Just ask them!) We also disciplined him.  We love him.  I was everything I could be to and for him, as was his dad.  However, we saw to it he turned out well.  It was not an accident, and a friend can not raise a good adult.  No, you are not raising a child, you are raising up an adult and what you do today will determine how they turn out ten, twenty years down the road.

For those who have children that are having a hard time and you just want things to be easy for them?  Jared is allergic to pertussis vaccine and had a severe reaction.  He stopped breathing eight (yes, 8) times before we could get him to the hospital.  I was a nurse, so that helped.  Some.  He is a Near-Miss-SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) child.  He had to wear an apnea monitor when he was asleep.  And he had to wear it for five years.  The medical equipment company nor the insurance company had ever had anyone on one that long.  He was also the first baby that Memorial Hospital had in their sleep study lab.  It was rough, let me tell you.  On top of that, he had hypogammaglobulinemia.  He had no immune system.  Yep, just like the boy in the bubble.  This meant fevers of 105 -106 with just a cold, a 24 hour stomach bug that lasted a week, chicken pox   F O U R    T I M E S.  This went on for three and  a half years with the doctor telling me there was no way he would live.  Why did he live?  I had read my Bible and kept telling the dr., “I read the Book.  I have a good G_d and He will not do that to me.  My son will not die!”  Those in the “Faith circles” call this a confession.  For those that don’t believe in that, I was doing what Mark 11:22-24 tell us to do.  And it worked!

And did I mention that Jared had a learning disability?  It is called Grapho-Motor Deficit:  He had no feeling in the end of his fingers so it was very difficult for him to write.  He did not need to be pampered.  He needed Parents.  And he got them!  Yes, we modified his school work to decrease the writing, and he did have an I. E. P., but he still had to do his work.

Not only did Jared live, and not only did he graduate high school, but he did it with honors.  IN MATH!!!!  He graduated with dual prep (classes necessary to go to community college and those necessary to go to a four-year university) and with numerous Geometry awards.  AND was in the top 9% of all graduating Georgia students in math on the states graduation test.  This is a literal impossibility for someone with Grapho-Motor Deficit!  I love that word, “impossible”.  That is like a dare to G-d.  (Yep,  I have a huge smile on my face right now!)

Yeah, he turned out A O K!

And yet, even with all of this under my belt, as it were, until I read this  article I still would wonder, “Was I a  good  enough  mother?”  I made so many mistakes!   I know I did a lot, but could I have done more?

This article nails it.  I follow Jenni at her blog                Jenni Mullinax: Live Called For The Glory of G-d          You might want to, also.

And to those that are totally overwhelmed?  YOU CAN DO THIS!!!  Read on.


Originally posted on Jenni Mullinax:

What Less-Than-Perfect Moms Need Most

As a single woman and a newlywed, I had grand ideas of what motherhood would look like. My children were never going to watch television during the day. I was going to be cool, calm and collected in the midst of trying times. The house would stay clean. I would serve nutritious meals every night. And my children would never throw fits, especially in public. I was a perfect parent before becoming a mother.imperfect mamaFast forward a few years and you will find me as the mother of an infant and toddler sometimes wondering how I’m going to make it through this crazy, beautiful thing called motherhood. There are dark days caused by a lack of sleep, toddler tantrums and other stresses that bring me to the end of myself. During these difficult moments the question that all mothers wonder lurks in the back of my mind… Am I enough? …

Continue reading here


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